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| Story about Go-Go or Striptease dancing in bars I Can't Imagine Myself Dancing Again
I left the friendly house where I lived, left my friends, everything. In Brooklyn (where I moved) my "agent" (Russian woman, who has a "dancing agency") put me in a room where I had to sleep on the floor for three days until I found a room for myself (I was lucky I found it very fast). My dancing career started. I was working six nights a week, the funniest thing is that every night we went back to NJ because all the bars were there. So I lived those two months just working and sleeping during the day time. (Thanks God these bars weren't topless. Girls in NJ dance in bikini, otherwise I would have never decided to do this.) Than I moved to a three-bedroom apartment with two Russian girls where I live till now.
I changed the "agencies" couple times and started working with the best one for me. I changed the bars and started to make good money. By that time I worked only 3-4 days a week and this was enough and I was able to save some money also. I sent some money to my family when they had some financial problems. It was great; a little bit of work, and I could do anything I wanted. But I knew this career was not for me. I was scared when I saw girls from our agency who have been dancing for 7-10 years. They had nothing. No family, no future. All they care about is only money to go out and get drunk, or something worse. I was asking myself how they were going to live in 10-15 years. You are not getting younger. And this kind of "job" makes you look older two times faster. I was thinking about myself what to do next. I had no papers, therefore I had no rights. The only option which came to my mind was to get married. I had candidates, but I couldn't imagine myself with any of them. To be short I'll just say that I found somebody to make it for money. Then I went to a beauty school, nine months I was in school. During that time I was in school five days a week and working two days. It was hard. It was hard to get used to American classmates, to that sometimes just very dumb system, but I did it! I finished my school, I received the papers which allowed me to work. I haven't been dancing for a month. Now I can not imagine myself dancing again. Also I entered the college this fall, and I'm looking for a job in a beauty salon. Maybe it is going to be hard to work for such a small amount of money comparing to "dancing money " but it's worth it. Dancing is a road to nowhere, it's the way where you destroy yourself . The worst thing it changes your attitude to life, to men, to people. Looking back at my first 5-6 months in America, I can say I was very very different. Now I am more "cold blooded", I am not that naive dreamy girl any more. I do not trust men, although I know that it can work against me. I meet a lot of guys but they pass by as fast as they appear. It is my fault, I meet one, I look at him and I find his minuses and he is not interesting anymore. I am lonely (even though I have a lot of attention). I hope it will change some day... But it is another story. Regina
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