 |
|
|
|
|
|
| It Is Snowing Again
Time for me to think…what a man is supposed to do for me? And who is he, a real man? I also had to write about my life…. I took tall the dictionaries, pen and a list of paper and tried to recall all the English words I ever learnt in school. I started my letter from the childhood. I wrote how I loved my parents and my country. To a little girl my dad was the most handsome, strong and kind man in his navy uniform. I wrote my school years, my work. I wrote how I was dreaming to hear some day from a handsome, strong and smart man that he would make anything to make me happy. What exactly? I did not go into details, he could guess himself. I was not looking anymore for a romantic and crazy love. I felt tired, but nevertheless I did not wish for myself a dull and routine life. I was open for new feelings and impressions. At the same I was wishing peace for my soul. I put the letter aside and remembered…my childhood. What a beautiful and big world around me! How kind and wise were my parents! How strong and comforting! What a wonderful river was nearby the country house! How big was the forest across the road! And ships in the dockyard! And the sea! There was so much of unknown, but magical and wonderful ahead. Then was a school time. My first knowledge of reality, where I could not be myself and could not become the one accepted in that world. I did not like school years at all. Graduation time came. How happy we were. Another huge and mysterious world was opened for us. And we entered… After that I did not want to recall the last. I wanted to dream about future. I put my letter in the envelope with my most recent picture in a red dress and send it. The time of waiting began. In a few days my friend called. There was a message from Frank: “I sent you a letter to your friend’s e-mail 3 days ago. You did not answer. So I am not sure if you received it or not. Of course, I am spoiled a bit having a computer at home and at work and I expect the same from others. Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you got my first letter. Maybe you decided not to write me anymore? Please, let me know. If you wish to continue, I will write you more about myself. “Did you understand? - my friend was too excited. - He is worried,
he is afraid you can stop writing. He is afraid to loose you. He is
yours. You can pack your cases.” That
was amazing, a new unknown life was revealing. I felt joyful and fearful
at the same time. I asked my friend to write him that I live quite away
from my friends and cannot go there so often to send e-mail and I mailed
a letter to him. He thanked in respond and said he would wait for my
letter. One week past, another and another, there was no answer from
him. Every day I was checking my mailbox and every day was pushing away
my hope to get it. After all, I start thinking there was no letter.
I thought he got my bad English letter, my picture that he probably
did not like and decided not write anymore. The feeling of the life change
went away. I was looking at the falling snow through the window and winter cold
was covering my soul.
|
|
Copyright © 2002-2006 RussianWomenMagazine.com
All Rights Reserved. |
Frank
got my e-mail late at night and to answer immediately he just sent a
message back. My friend read it to me over the phone with her emotional
remarks about it. Nothing unusual, just a polite response. Though I
could feel his interest in me. He asked me to write more about life,
my past and myself. He also asked what a man should do to make me happy.